I recently joined the Facebook group Parents Against Babywise. I actually read the book On Becoming Babywise when I was pregnant with Jude, in fact it's still sitting on my bookshelf. A family member had recommended the book to me because it had worked great for her. I was 21 at the time and took all the advice that I could regarding parenthood.
So anyway, I read the book and it had some good points. I used the general idea of feeding time, wake time, then sleep time with baby Jude. It worked well. He cried occasionally when I put him down but never very hard or long. He was a great sleeper and slept through the night early on. I thought this was the right way because I had read a book and it worked for us. I even recommended the book to my friends and family- sorry to all of you!
Then came Lennon! I tried the same general idea. It did NOT work! He was totally opposite of Jude, he would have cried hard for hours. I asked my pediatrician and he informed me that newborns do not come equipped with the ability to self-soothe, duh right?? I knew right then that Jude was naturally a good sleeper and Lennon was not. Every baby is different and it just so happened that Jude was a very calm baby and happy going to sleep by himself. Lennon was fiery, needy, and outspoken from the minute he was born.
There is no one approach fits all when it comes to raising babies. As a naive young parent I didn't see that. My confidence has grown along with my age thankfully and now I realize how important it is to trust your instincts, especially your mothering instinct. I type this as my 14 month old sits in my lap nursing, tapping his heel on the computer desk, despite every ones questions about when I'm going to wean him : )
Yeah for you Paige! Coleman is 13 months & I'm still getting that question too. I've decided my response is "when he's 9 or 10." Bwah ha ha!
ReplyDeleteMy best friend is an AVID "baby wise" fan & it's really put a strain on our relationship because of it. My sister used it for her first, but realized it would work for her 2nd. She's still an advocate of it though. : (
I'm on a personal crusade to snatch every copy I find & burn them! : )
My DH & I can really see the personality differences in her kids, (all CIO) and Coleman (attachement). It's sad. It's like there is no life in their eyes.
i joined the group the minute i saw you join. did not work for scout either as you know.... this coming from a mommy who still cuddles with her 2 year old in OUR bed every morning (some how she wiggles her way in between nick and i every night!). i don't mind one bit either, well a king size bed would make it easier but whatever. glad i listened to my instincts.
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