Unassisted birth

I've been intrigued lately by the idea of an unassisted birth. Just a women, her husband, and maybe her mother, a close friend, or her other children there (at home) and that is it. No hospital staff, no midwife, just a women giving birth the way nature intended, the way women have been doing it for thousands of years. Now I'm not saying I'm comfortable enough to have an unassisted birth but I think the concept is beautiful.

Out of curiosity, I Googled  "how to deliver a baby." The first website I went to was http://firstaid.about.com/od/childbirth/ht/deliverbaby.htm. It was quite humorous!

Step 1- Go to the hospital. Why, so they can tell me that I'm not progressing fast enough and I need to have a cesarean if I want my baby to be safe and healthy??

Step 2- Get comfortable. She (the mom) can lay on her side until delivery.Well, how kind of you to let me lay on my side and not get up so that gravity can work against me in getting my baby out.

Step 3- Wash your hands and wear personal protective equipment. I agree that washing your hands is a good idea but personal protective equipment like gloves, a gown, and a face mask? Come on, do they expect the baby to come out covered in hazardous waste?

Step 4- Check for crowning. Be sure to report what color hair the baby has!

Step 5- Guide the baby. In case it's not sure which way to go! Now here's where it gets funny- Don't try to hold the baby back, but don't let it explode from the vagina either. WHAT?!?!? Now I've never delivered a human baby (I've helped with calves) but I didn't know it was possible for a baby to explode out of a vagina! Talk about one crazy mental image, and that would make for quite a birth story. Yes my labor went very fast, so fast my baby actually exploded out of my vagina : )

The next few steps are pretty logical.


Guide the shoulders. Wrap baby up. Deliver the placenta. 


Still, the last step says to go to the hospital. Do people really think that for all of mankind women have been delivering babies in hospitals? Babies are born to survive with the care of loving parents not hospital staff poking and prodding at them.

This is a picture of the author of this article.
I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want this dude delivering my baby!